961. TENACITY: Feed It, Build It, and Never Lose it.

Let's get it! Welcome to episode 961. In this episode, I’m breaking down what tenacity really means—not the hustle-culture kind, but the kind that rewrites who you are when life pushes back. We’ll discuss why starting is the easy part, but running it is where tenacity truly resides. We'll also explore how to change your default settings under pressure and the small daily moments where you can nurture it, build it, and never lose it.

Transcript

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what are people gonna remember about you when you're gone? Well, that's a way to start a episode, right? What are people gonna remember about you when you're gone? For me, if my kids could say one thing about their dad, I'd want'em to say my dad was tenacious. Because here's the truth, life doesn't hand out anything big without resistance. If you wanna triple your income, if you wanna start a business, if you wanna change your health, if you wanna break an old habit, you're gonna have to fight for it. Not once, but every damn day. That's a fight. That's the refusal to give in. It's that stubbornness, that resolve. That obstinance that's called tenacity, and it's the one trait that's going to rewrite your defaults. So today I wanna break down what tenacity really is and how you may have misunderstood it, and how when you use it, when you leverage it. You can multiply it across several areas of your life, your faith, your family, your fitness, your finances, your fulfillment, and how to spot everyday ways that you can actually build more tenacity. Now, first things first, tenacity. Really gets misunderstood. Tenacity kind of has a bad rap at times because a lot of times when you think of someone who's tenacious you, you probably think of it somewhat in a negative light, like someone who just bullies their way in, they're bulldozer, they're overbearing, intimidating, maybe even a little bit controlling. And because of that, a lot of times people kind of shy away from that. They don't wanna be too much of something, but here's the truth. Success demands. Tenacity. But before I talk about what tenacity is, I think we need to define tenacity. And that's the first thing I did. Like I know of the word tenacious, tenacity, I know of the word, but I never really like looked it up. And that's what you should do. Like at times, like you, you're like. What does that word really mean? This is one reason why I like to read sometimes on electronic devices, because you can just push and hold down the button. And the definition will come up. So I looked up the word tenacious, and here are a few definitions holding fast. Like no matter what storm comes. You don't let go. Tenacity is also like a firm hold. You're aligned and you're anchored in purpose. It's an anchoring effect. And even if you don't know what your full purpose is, you have something in there you could just hold onto. You have a firm hold on it and mysteriously, man, these things begin to. Become more clear, get more solid, give you a better grip. Another definition of tenacity is being highly retentive. That's important. You retain the good stuff, you retain the lessons, you stack the growth, you discard all the other stuff. You're persistent when you're tenacious. You keep going when other people stop, you keep going. When other people are like, why are you still doing this? You don't even explain. You're just like, I can't explain. I just gotta go. When you're tenacious, you're obstinate. This was my favorite when word being obstinate is not easily overcome. Not easily controlled. Firmly adhered to by some sort of purpose. And then you're stubborn. I looked up the word stubborn. I know of the word. I looked it up. Stubborn is being highly obstinate. Is like obstinate. Next level. You resolute. And you refuse to be suppressed. And the last definition of tenacity is adhesive. You have a stickiness to you. You don't fall apart easily. And bro, when I read, the definition of tenacity, I thought. That's what I wanna be more of. Not easily overcome, not yielding, firmly adhering to a purpose, and I will not be suppressed. That's the real body of tenacity. And it reframes the whole conversation, see, once you see tenacity through that lens, the opportunities. You realize it shows up everywhere. It does. It's the key to growth. It's the key to success, and success demands tenacity. See, starting something is easy running. It takes tenacity, like take a business for example. Starting an LLC takes less than a hundred bucks. Everybody can start a business. Can you run it? The only way that you're gonna run it is tenacity. I, I, I watched this firsthand. My wife started a gym. Starting the gym wasn't that difficult. We got the line of credit, we found the location, she got the equipment. She started an all women's gym. That was the easy part running it. Creating an awareness, building momentum, staying in the fight when nobody was showing up. Like literally sleeping on the couch with, with no members, nobody was showing up. Takes tenacity. See, starting is easy. It takes tenacity to run it. Joining a gym, that's the easy part. Showing up when you don't feel like it. That takes tenacity. Showing up when you don't have the results fast enough, takes tenacity, and it it does, it sprinkles in all areas. I mean, think about your profession, like for me in sales, getting into sales, it's free. I mean, it was nothing to it. Hey, they just tell 'em to gimme a shot. Staying in sales 27 years later. Oh, it takes tenacity 'cause there's a crisis every damn week, bro. When the rejection hits, when it seems like nothing's working, it takes tenacity to stay in the fight. And the more you lean into tenacity, obstinate. You're stubborn, you're sticky high retention like you just a dog on a bone. The more you do this, it's gonna actually change your default settings, and this is the trippy part. See, we all have these default settings. Tenacity can actually change your default settings. The default settings are what you revert to without even thinking. Like when the shit hits the fan, when you're tired, when it ain't working, when you're angry, when it's stuck default. And the more tenacious you are, the more it moves that baseline, your tenacity strengthens. And so what you once defaulted to through tenacity, you move that baseline. Now you're leveling up. So when you default, when you're angry, when you're stuck, when it ain't working, when you're tired, the default is not way down. It's not in the trenches anymore. You have a new baseline, a new platform that you can actually push off of and move up again, tenacity, rewrites, all that. I mean. Think about if you're trying to lose weight, it ain't the diet. I mean it is, but to stay with the diet that takes tenacity to stay with the whole program, that takes tenacity. Breaking an addiction takes tenacity, refusing to stay the same when all around you, the, your environment you're in. Is is is telling you to stay the same is to just give up, takes tenacity to reach that escape velocity. And here's what's beautiful. Here's the blessing of tenacity. When you can build tenacity in one area of your life, you can actually leverage it into other areas of your life. See, there's five buckets. In your life. There's faith, there's family, there's fitness, there's finances, there's fulfillment. That's the five areas. And so obviously you can't tackle all five areas. Like if, if you're just not a tenacious person, you're just not having the success in different areas of your life. Okay. So attack the one that is, the first one you think of could be either your finances or your fitness. That's a common one. So attack that first. And when you attack your finances and you get that thing right sized and you attack it every day, you don't hide from it anyway anymore. You don't make your situation worse. You stare at that thing, you punch that shit in the stomach. You become more tenacious. You say No, you build it, you stand up to it. You start winning at it. Then you can leverage that tenacity now into your fitness, and then you start. Same program just. Different focus. And so you're, you've got that tenacity built up in your finances. Now you leverage that into your fitness. Now you can leverage that into your family, into your relationships, cultivating healthy relationships. Then you can leverage it into your fulfillment professional or creative fulfillment. Then you can leverage it into your face. See, see, this just goes on and on and on. Now here's the thing, it's never set it and forget it. You can never just like, oh, okay, I got the, they're, they're like spinning plates, okay, they are. So you get that thing fed, but man, you gotta, you gotta feed that beast every day. You do. This is what's gonna make you more tenacious when you wanna shrink, when you want to coward, when you want to be like, ah, I don't see that. No. Gotta be tenacious. That tenacity will compound and bleed in every area of your life. This is what creates a full-bodied life for you. This is what creates, I would say, happiness. Remember, happy is an emotion. Happiness is a direction, and so there's a sense of satisfaction. There's a sense of winning. There's a sense of courage and a freedom. It's like, fuck this man. Like something comes at you. You're like, all right. Let's go. I'm fucking winning, man. There's, there's a sense, but you gotta get to that. So it's these everyday moments. You got a spot and, and build that tenacity. So how do you do that? It, they're all around, like all these opportunities, like everything, almost everything I talk about every day, it's right there for, for the taking. I just try to bring an awareness to it, and I'm telling you, I'm telling me too. This is why I share these things, because as I share it, I learn it deeper too. So how do you develop tenacity? Choosing a hard conversation instead of avoiding it? Not letting things build up. Just confront it. It's a whole lot better. You do it now and maybe it, it didn't come out great. Alright? The more you do it, the better you communicate, the better you'll get at it. Another way to develop tenacity is stay curious when cynicism, when it's so much easier to just default to cynicism. No. Instead of making a statement some sort of r as judgment asking in a form of a question, Being creative. When you lack the resources, you get resourceful. Stop bitching about what you don't have. Well, if only I had no, what do you have? You do that more and more. More. It's tenacity, practicing a skill when it's so easy to just default to the lower level skill, the one that you've been using forever. You keep tatan, you keep avoiding the new skills that you need to learn, that you need to develop. Takes tenacity, man to just stay with that new skill. Even though you look like a rookie, even though you look foolish, even though your numbers may drop a little bit, you stay with it 'cause you're developing a new skill takes tenacity. It's confronting your own excuses instead of avoiding them. See, I mean, it's, it's not these. These monumental hit the wall moments that develop tenacity. Like I've had some hit the wall moments. I've been bankrupt. I've been demoted. I've been homeless for a time. I had some addictions. I've been depressed to the point of wanting to end it all., The only reason why I'm here today is because I refuse to stay there. I was tenacious, I was obstinate, I was stubborn, and I will not be suppressed. That's why tenacity matters. But see, you don't have to have these hit the wall moments to develop tenacity. You don't. It's these everyday occurrences, so you just confront these things. This is why productive confrontation is so key. It's what I coach on. It's one of the five life skills you should be working on every day. Communication, curiosity, creativity, continuous learning and action, and productive confrontation. That's how you cultivate tenacity. It's not something you wait on. It's something you train for every day life, precious seconds. These are all ways to develop tenacity. So I bring you this episode because I want you more tenacious. Like just asking yourself in your reflective time, where do I need to rewrite some of my defaults? Like what are some things that, when I'm in the crunch, when I'm in the thick, what is my default setting? Do I like that default setting? Or do I have to spend a week trying to recover from that default setting? Do I give all my wins back? Change of default setting, taste, tenacity. What areas in your life, man, do you need to refuse to say the same? Like that's called sick and tired of being sick and tired. Like where do you need to change these things? Tenacity, where do you need to be stubborn, but in the right way? I was reading Create Something Beautiful, make something beautiful. I think that's the name of it. It's from the Steve Jobs archive. It's a free book. You can, uh, download it. Uh, Steve Jobs's wife, really did a beautiful job compiling photos, emails, and put it together in a beautiful book. I was reading yesterday and Steve Jobs said sometimes when he is interviewing people he says stuff off the wall like really presses 'em like that was stupid. That was a dumb decision.'cause he wants to get a rise out of him, but he also wants to see if they cave under pressure. If they, if they, and he's like the worst thing. He's like, I shouldn't even be telling you this 'cause this is one of my secrets. He was like, the last thing I ever want someone I'm interviewing is to agree with what I said. Yeah. That was, yeah. That was a pretty stupid program that I was a part of. He's like, no. He's like, I, I want that person to stand up To what I say and not just bend under pressure.'cause if they do it now, they're gonna always do it. So he is like, I do that on purpose to see if they actually, if they're stubborn in their thinking and they're willing to disagree with me, they're willing to say, yeah, it wasn't the right result, but here's what I learned from it, and here's what we did from there. See, that's standing up, that's being stubborn, that's being tenacious. It's what it takes. So that's why I say like, what areas do you need to be stubborn in the right way? Tenacity is not about grinding yourself in the ground, it's, it's refusing to stay separated from the future that you see. And that tenacity. It's a sense that you gotta, you, you have to feed it every day. It's never gonna be set it and forget it. This is how you become unstoppable. And if you don't like, like where you are right now in life, you're just kind of bummed out. You're just not tenacious enough. Good news is, man, you can, you can get it back. Like you can get it. You can become more of it. But tenacity is like a muscle man. You have to work at it every single day. You gotta take that bitch to the gym every single day. That's why I say you gotta train for it. So I want you to, you may have to re-listen to this episode and really just kind of do a gut check like. I gotta be more tenacious in my faith, in my family, in my fitness, in my finances, in my fulfillment. Both professional and creative. These are things, man. These are, these are solid areas. This is like I'm, you find yourself frustrated, you find yourself stuck, find yourself kind of regressed rest, okay? Probably not tenacious enough. Good news is you can get it back. Alright, so next episode I'm gonna talk about is resistance. And I think it, I think it feeds in nicely with tenacity. I just finished writing it. I'm gonna think about it some more. And I'm actually changing the three problems. The three problems we all face. Adversity, uncertainty, and complacency. I've said that for years, but I'm actually changing that. Proof you have a mind is your ability to change it. That last one just never quite fit. Right. Complacency. So this morning I realized it's resistance. So it's adversity, uncertainty, and resistance. That's the third universal problem we all face. So I'll unpack that like. Like what is resistance? How do you spot it, and how you can actually leverage it. It's never gonna go away, but how you can actually leverage it. So be sure and subscribe. So that way you'll, uh, you'll check out that episode Also, I, I think when we switched over from the name, 'cause this podcast we just made on October 3rd. We just made, uh, eight years. So thank you for, for being here. And it's, it's been, it's, it's been a wonderful ride. My life is, this podcast actually saved my life because it is shaped the way I think, and this is why it's so near and dear to me. Um, lost my train of thought on that. Oh, I think when we, when we, um. When we switched over, 'cause this has been called the Sales Life. It's been called the Marsh Buice Podcast. And then I think a couple years ago we switched it over to what's your problem? I guess when you switch over, when you switch the name, it knocks out all of your, uh, reviews. And so I was looking this morning on Apple, we have like two reviews. So we roll out over a hundred thousand downloads, but only two reviews, top 3% podcasts in the world. Only two reviews. And the review reviews are, it, it's for new people. It's for people that there, there's millions and millions of podcast episodes out there. And so the reviews actually. Help peoples. It, it's, it's kind of like, I mean, it's like any review. It's like a Google review for a business you like. You look that up before you go to a restaurant. Like people look that up before they listen to an episode. So saying all that to say, if you will leave a review, if you've left one before, man, if you could leave a new one, that'd be great. Um, you know, what episode is your favorite? Like, why do you come back to what's your problem? And so that'll help. And then also sharing this episode, I just wanna get the word out. I just want more people to realize that it's never too late. I'm living proof of that. You're living proof of that. This is why you come back to that. And there's so much more. And life is super, super simple. It's not easy, but we can make it simple, and that's what I wanna do. I wanna simplify my day to maximize my life. This is why I try to share these little bite-size episodes. This one's a little bit longer, but this is why I try to share these, these episodes, bite-size, so that way you can apply 'em. I call 'em commute episodes. So while you're commuting, by the time you get to work, that episode is good and done, and now you can apply it to your life. So if you would help build that ecosystem, I got a lot of, a lot of ideas, a lot of things I wanna do in the future but I need your help in doing it. Can't, certainly can't do it alone. All right, so let's get outta here with that. Remember, keep it simple, keep it moving. Never settle. Stay tough. Peace fps.